I feel like this reflection should be a send-off to the class. Writing it reminds me (perhaps because of reading Kelley’s excellent memoir for the first time this afternoon) of writing my valedictorian speech for graduation back in high school. I suppose that was a much larger step in my life, but this one is more significant to me. For some of us this semester is graduation, and so the end of this class can, to a point, be a marker of the end of our (undergraduate, at least) writing education; for others, myself included, this is the end of another class at UMW: not the first class we’ve completed, but not the last, either.
Yet, in my mind and on this page, the end of this class signals the end of something far more treasured than high school ever was. When I had to make a speech then, I didn’t want to (though, I admit, my reasons were far more petty than Kelley’s); I finally buckled under parental pressure and did something I was still relatively happy with, but from the beginning my heart wasn’t in it. I was ready to be out. Now, though, despite the fact that this post isn’t even supposed to be a send-off for the class, I find that my main concern is finding a way to do the experience justice. You’d think that making that happen for four years of my life would be more difficult than for four months, but there it is.
In exploring everyone’s blogs more thoroughly than I had before, I was left with many impressions. The first - the strongest right now - is a sense of regret that I didn’t pay the blogs more attention before this. Certainly, I did what was assigned, and tried to do those assignments well, but when there was no assignment, the blogs were out of sight, out of mind. Now, though, I see my error. I am struck by the diversity of voices in this class, in and out of the classroom. I wish I had heard more of them before, and wish even more that I could continue hearing from them. I was amazed at the number of times I was compelled to stop and read (I mean, I was doing that already, of course, good student that I am, but I mean really read) something posted on a blog. I found new versions of papers which I had workshopped, and the changes - I almost said improvements, but that often wouldn’t give the originals enough credit - were staggering. I found papers which I hadn’t read at all because of the way the groups were arranged, and wished that, somehow, I could’ve read them before.
To offer my experiences:
I marveled at Ashley G’s progression, from shy, reserved student-who-sometimes-had-to-write-stuff to a sincere and endearing writer;
I admired the bluntness and intelligence with which Ashley M presented her opinions, and wish that I could be so forward;
I appreciated Claire’s ability to relate class discussion with reality, and to show us all that the writer is not some mystical, unknowable power, but something we can find everywhere;
I found the insights of writers like Dave and Kristen refreshing, for coming from such different writers than myself and for being so undeniably valid;
I relished the opportunity to discover pieces I had missed during workshops, most notably Jocelyn and Kelley’s memoirs, which were both wonderful;
and I was stunned by the beauty of Stephanie’s words, which painted pictures both lavish, deep, and alive.
I wish I could put into words everything else; you all deserve my praise and thanks. I am glad that I didn’t miss this opportunity, for it has changed me as a writer, seeing so many different perspectives, both from other writers and from readers (who happen to be writers), and I hope that the experience has been as beneficial for everyone else. But that’s straying into the domain of my other final post, I suppose.
Like has happened so often in this class, I have reached a point where I know what I want to say, but not how to say it. Fortunately, I found someone else who had more success articulating the sentiment, and so I direct you to Ashley M’s post on the class blog. She said it better than I could. (I wonder if it’s ironic or fitting that I’m citing someone else’s blog in my reflection on the class blogs…)
Thank you everyone for the fine and constructive comments which you have given me over the course of this…uh…course.
Thanks for the words.
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